Bear Back To Back

Lola Champ wins Bowling For Booze 2007 and achieves the Double Double!

It was touted as the closest contest in Bowling For Booze history, but in the end it was a walk in the park for the Bear.

Having left our nation’s capital for the first time, Bowling for Booze 2007 took to the provincial road and arrived in Inverness.

Big talk from new boy Trumpton (based on being half-Yank and having once owned his own bowling ball), was unfounded and resulted in nothing more than the wooden spoon, Kitten recorded the 2nd lowest score of all time (59), closely followed by Trumpton’s 61, and the Bear strolled towards a simple victory.

Full pride was later restored that evening with some magnificent Travoltaesque displays on the city's dancefloors, with the assistance of Charlie Bigbags.

Hawley’s Hole Voted The Best!

Mr Richard Hawley's Hole has been voted the Lola’s Favourite Memory.

With an impressive 73% of the vote, as nominated by his peers, there is little doubt that the efforts made by the King of Ginge on the opening day of this year’s Lola will forever have a place in the hearts of all those who witnessed it.

Lola 2007 - 1st Hole of 1st Round at The Players Golf Club, Bristol:

Par 4 360yds.

Having watched playing partners Kitten & Wallace hit shots down the middle, a tentative Hawley stepped onto the 1st tee of his home course and prepared for his opening shot.

Without being disastrous, the shot, a nasty chuff, veered to the right a little, landing 100yds away behind a small pond that neither Kitten nor Wallace had noticed before.

Requiring a good 2nd strike to get close to the green the flame-haired Bristolian took an over generous divot and knobbed his ball into the small pond.

An unfortunate repetition of his 2nd shot saw the ball plop into the centre of rings still dissipating across the water’s surface.

Dropping a ball to play his 6th shot, the normally unflappable Hawley was getting noticeably flushed (even from 250yds away by the green where Kitten & Wallace were now viewing the unwinding drama).

A perfect replica of his previous two strokes sent increasing waves over the now turbulent waters of the small pond.

Double figures looming and the small pond resembling the Atlantic, our intrepid golfer stuck another one in the drink and stuck his head in his golf bag to rummage for balls/weep.

Giving it his all, the Mighty Hawley cracked his 10th (and best shot for quite some time), out across the water and just inches from terra firma. An angered voice could be heard by those on the green, but the words were indecipherable.

Then, much to the relief of Kitten & Wallace (whose stomach muscles were now getting really quite hurty) an ugly ball eventually came trundling up the fairway.

A few minutes later.... a stunned, burbling and slightly deranged looking former champion announced that he’d used up almost his entire +16 handicap on one hole.

A record breaking 12 over par ‘16’ on the 1st.

Footnote: Hawley went on to steady the ship over the next couple of rounds, until finishing in disastrous fashion and claiming the Wooden Spoon by one stroke on the final hole, with his final putt.

Well done Sir and thanks for the Memories.

How the voting went:

Hawley’s Hole 2007: 73%
Drink Drive Tree 2002: 13%
Cam Shitting 2004: 6%
Webbie Practice Knob 2000: 6%

Lola Champion Reproduces!

A wholehearted congratulation goes out to our reigning champ ‘Big Bear Bain’ following the birth of his daughter ‘Baby Bear Bain’ on the 3rd December 2007 at Tesco Car Park, Inverness.

Best wishes have been flooding into the Lola Office throughout the day:

“I didn’t know she was pregnant!”
2002 winner R Hawley

“He told me he was a virgin”
Double Champ Tull

“Oh shit!”
Cool Hand Kelly, 2005 Spoon.

Well done to Champ & Missus from all at Lolablog!

Rose Chokes In Sun City

Justin Rose blew his chance of victory in the Nedbank Golf Challenge with a double-bogey 6 at the final hole in Sun City. Home favourite Trevor Immelman, who was doing his very best to take the title of ‘choker of the day ’, needed only to finish bogey, bogey, bogey for a one shot victory and a cheque for £725,000.

Both Immelman and Rose started the day on 16 under, and South African Immelman played great golf through 15, before bogeying the 16th and 17th which brought the two back to all square. Then with the door opening for Rose on the 18th the Englishman hooked his drive into the rough, had to lay up in front of the water, twatted his 3rd into the grandstand, knobbed his chip and ended up with a 6, to lose by one.

2007 Lola runner up Webbie said.

“I know how the poor bastard feels, I led the final round of this years Lola right up until my final missed putt on the 18th!”

FINAL LEADERBOARD
-16 T Immelman (SA)
-15 J Rose (Eng)
-11 E Els (SA)
-7 H Stenson (Swe)
-6 R Sabbatini (SA)
-5 L Donald (Eng), Ogilvy (Aus)

Golf Babe - Anna Rawson

Is Anna Rawson the hottest female in World Golf today?

I’m going to say yes!

Australian golf professional (& model) Anna Rawson is currently 29th in the Money List on the Ladies European Tour, and if she ever wants to play in a proper tournament then The Lola door is always open.

For more pics visit ANNA RAWSON

Blog Settings

The Settings have been changed so that anyone can now comment on Posts.

Boat of Garten - Club of the Month - December 2007

Situated on the River Spey in the Cairngorm Mountains, Boat of Garten Golf Club is repeatedly hailed as one of the best short inland courses in Scotland.

Founded in 1898 the original 6 holes became 18 in 1932, designed by the famous Scottish architect James Braid.

At 5,876yds from the back tees and 5,648yds from the yellows, The Boat (as it is known locally) is not a long course, but make no mistake, only those hitting accurately from the tees are likely to be carding good scores. Tight tree-lined fairways snake their way between birch and pine, the ground undulates throughout and quite often you’ll be tested with ball sitting above or below your feet on the fairway. The greens are always among the best in the area, and even if the golf isn’t going according to plan you’ll be rewarded with a truly memorable day out, as The Boat is blessed with wonderful views of the surrounding landscape.

If you’re visiting, or just passing through the Strathspey & Badenoch area then playing a round at Boat of Garten is an absolute must!

BOAT OF GARTEN WEBSITE

Golf Fact: The Lola has been played at The Boat twice - 1st Round 2004 & 1st Round 2006

Shortlist Revealed for BBC Sports Personality of the Year 2007

Golfer Justin Rose has been included in the shortlist for the 2007 BBC Sports Personality of the Year award.




The Contenders and their achievements:

Lewis Hamilton – Threw away F1 Title
Andy Murray – Was a little bit grumpy
Christine Ohuruogu – Forgetful 400m World Champion
Paula Radcliffe – Had baby, won a race, managed not to piss herself!
Jason Robinson - Ran around a bit at World Cup and retired
Justin Rose - Captured golf's European Order of Merit Title
James Toseland – Who?
Jonny Wilkinson – F**k Off!
Joe Calzaghe - Undisputed World Super-middleweight Champion.
Ricky Hatton – Best Light-welterweight in the World

Kitten’s Opinion: Calzaghe takes the title having defeated Kessler and cementing himself as the best Super-Middleweight on the Planet, unless however, Ricky Hatton whups Mayweather next weekend, then the crown must go to the Hitman.

Who gives a toss really? Prince Harry will probably get the award for shooting Hen Harriers and winning the odd game of Soggy Biscuit.

Golf Nut Knievel Is Dead

Daredevil motorcyclist Evel Knievel has died aged 69 following a long battle with the incurable lung disease pulmonary fibrosis.

Famed for his legendary stunt attempts, Knievel entertained millions during the 60’s and 70’s and will be remembered as much for his spectacular crashes as his successes, most notably his bone breaking motorcycle jump over the fountains at Caesar’s Palace, Las Vegas in 1968, which put him in a coma for a month.

Golf and gambling played a major part in Knievel’s life, a low handicapper, he would sometimes bet as much as $100,000 on a game. He played hard but fair and had no time for cheaters. Never one to back down from a bet he once pulled a gun on a playing partner who surreptitiously attempted to kick his ball from the rough and on to the fairway.

On occasion he combined both golf and daredevil stunts:

“I'd make a jump on a motorcycle before I'd jump with a golf cart again. In the mid-'70s I played a lot of golf at Rivermont in Alpharetta, Ga. The 17th hole there is a par 3 that's steeply downhill. The path has a series of hairpin turns, and if you ignore them you'll just keep going over a huge ledge. The guys I hung out with down there pointed out that if you gathered enough speed you could go over the cliff and land where the path resumes farther down the hill. For days they dared me to make the jump, and when I came to the hole in a foul mood one afternoon--I wasn't playing well--I just went for it. Halfway down the hill I realized I'd made a mistake. You have no idea how unstable a three-wheel golf cart is when it becomes airborne. By the grace of God I made a perfect three-point landing, but the tires were like basketballs, and the cart bounced like an SOB. When I got the thing stopped down near the green, I immediately got a royal chewing out from my wife. I couldn't blame her. She'd been in the passenger seat the whole time.”

Evel Knievel October 17th 1938 – November 30th 2007

Knievel Website

Gone But Not Forgotten

Lolo Ferrari

4th March 1962 - 5th March 2000

On the 2827th day since her death we remember Lolo Ferrari.

MAY SHE REST IN PEACE.

Nb Sorry about the spelling mix up.

Trump Gets Humped!

Trump's £1bn golf plan rejected

Donald Trump is considering an appeal after his plans to create a £1bn golf resort were rejected by councillors.

The US billionaire, who wants to build a golf complex and housing development at the Menie Estate in Aberdeenshire, said he was surprised by the decision.

The controversial project was given outline planning approval last week, but then went to Aberdeenshire Council's infrastructure committee.

It rejected the plans on the chairman's casting vote after a tied vote. A spokeswoman for Mr Trump told BBC Scotland: "We are surprised by the decision, it would have been a great development.

"We are considering an appeal, and also considering doing something very spectacular in another location. Sadly, it will not be in Scotland."

FULL STORY

Humour

A married couple playing golf together.

On the first tee the husband settles down to play his shot while his wife waits up ahead by the red ladies tee.

He hits a lovely shot but unfortunately it smacks his wife on the back of her head killing her instantly.

At the inquest into the wife's death the coroner states “It is clear how this woman died, she was hit on the head with a golf ball as there was a perfect imprint of a Titleist No.2 golf ball on the back of her skull.”

The husband says "Yes that was my ball"

The coroner then goes onto say that he’s a little concerned that a Topflite ball was found inserted up the womans arse, and could the husband shed some light on this?

Husband: "Oh that must have been my provisional, I wondered where it’d gone!"

Lola 2008 - Where?

Welcome to the Lola Blog, your gateway to all things Lola.

Recent conversations with various LolaBoys has seen Spain emerge as a possible venue for next years Lola.

Let's leave the actual organisation until the New Year, once babies have been born, Christmas out of the way etc.

But give us your thoughts in the meantime please; mainland, islands, nightlife, villa/hotel etc. I thought Mallorca could be a goer!

You'll have to sign up to this blog before you can post.

Kitten x

Past Lola Winners & Losers

2011 North Berwick, Scotland
Champion - C Bain
Bridesmaid - J Shurgold
Spoon - P Galpin

2010 PGA Catalunya, Spain
Champion - R Chisholm
Bridesmaid - B Pruess
Spoon - J Tulloch

2009 Kingsbarns, Scotland
Champion - J Shurgold
Bridesmaid - S Kelly
Spoon - C Bain

2008 Esery, France
Champion - A Johnston
Bridesmaid - A Eggleston
Spoon - S Kelly

2007 Bowood, Bristol, England
Champion – C Bain
Bridesmaid – M Webster (choked really badly)
Spoon – R Hawley

2006 Spey Valley, Aviemore, Scotland
Champion – C Bain
Bridesmaid – A Hilliard (choked)
Spoon – D Kay

2005 Las Vegas National, USA
Champion – B Wallace
Bridesmaid – M Webster
Spoon – S Kelly

2004 Grantown-on-Spey, Scotland
Champion – R Chisholm
Bridesmaid – B Wallace
Spoon – R Ower
Nb. C Bain retired after 3 rounds due to a very runny bottom and somehow avoided the Spoon!

2003 Gullane, Edinburgh, Scotland
Champion – J Tulloch
Joint Bridesmaids – M Webster & S Kelly
Spoon – R Hawley (retired due to drunkeness)

2002 Vilamoura, Portugal
Champion – R Hawley
Bridesmaid – J Tulloch
Spoon – H Wallace

2001 Gleneagles, Scotland
Champion – J Tulloch
Bridesmaid – C Bain
Spoon – R Chisholm (retired due to inability to hit ball)